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Incomplete Thought Disorder
By Cathy Hall
I have developed this…
well, it’s not really a…see,
it’s just that….
I can’t finish a
sentence. Oh, I can write
a complete sentence just
fine, with punctuation
and capitalization and
everything. But when
it comes to speaking a
complete thought…well,
that seems to be a different
matter.
At first, I believed my
disorder was age-related. I couldn’t remember this
quirky illness being around
when I was younger. My
grown-up kids, hanging
about the nest, are always
yelling, “Could you
PLEASE finish ONE
complete sentence?” I
think I’d remember if they
were yelling something as
intelligent (and polite) as
that when they were tots.
Plus, there’s my mom.
She is, hands down, the
Queen of Unfinished
Sentences. More often
than not, we could end our
conversations in twenty
minutes, if I didn’t spend
another hour waiting for
mom to get to the point.
But then, a few weeks
ago, I heard a fine gentleman
give a presentation. Unfortunately, I can’t tell
you any of the particulars,
as he never quite got to
the particulars. At first, I
couldn’t put my finger on
what was so…what’s the
word? Oh, yeah. Annoying.
Until the woman next
to me mouthed, “If he
doesn’t finish a sentence,
I’m going to smack him
upside the head.”
Anyway, that fine
fellow was way younger
than my mom. And a tad
younger than me. So, I
have to rule out the age
factor.
Next, I considered
what we (the fine fellow,
my mom, and me) had in
common. And eureka! I
realized that we were all
(and I blush to say this) didn’t I just figure out
the cause of incompletesentence-
disorder? I
couldn’t wait to share
my discovery with Mr.
Hall (who, if I’m being
honest, has threatened to
hit me upside the head on
more than one occasion of
leaving him dangling in
mid-thought.).
Mr. Hall did not agree
with my conclusion.
In fact, Mr. Hall came
to an entirely different
conclusion. To wit, we
(that fellow and me) are
crazy. (He took the Fifth
on mom.)
Hmmph. He says
“crazy”. I say “smart”.
So, let’s just call the
whole thing….
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Cathy Hall is a freelance
writer who loves to get
published. Read her blog at
cathychall.blogspot.com
if you want to find out
where she meets Fame and
Fortune along the way.
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